Doomsday

On Fridays, we go to David's mom's house for dinner and usually, some horrid movie that she has selected because Netflix "recommended" it to her.  We keep trying to tell her that the reason Netflix keeps recommending those movies is because she keeps picking them!  We have seen such movies as "The Gravedancers"(which was hilarious more than scary), "In a Dark Place" (which was truly heinous and we watched only because David has some kind of unnatural crush on Leelee Sobieski--EW) and "The Lost Boys: The Tribe," which was a sequel that should have never been made.  Ever.  Tonight was no different.  ReRe had selected for our viewing pleasure, "Doomsday," which I am going to attempt to recap for you, if I can remember all of it.

So, the movie sounded pretty good on the Netflix envelope.  Killer virus runs rampant, a bunch of people die, someone has find a cure.  I know, no one's ever thought of THAT plot.  Anyway, it's set in Great Britain, as most virus movies are and this particular virus is called the Reaper virus.  It makes people get these giant pustules all over their faces and bleed out of their eyeballs and throw up all over the place.  Nice, right?  Anyway, the entire northern half of GB gets walled off with this giant steel barrier. There's all this rioting and a man gets his hand squished when the wall shuts and this woman's little girl gets her eye shot out.  The woman shoves her daughter on an army helicopter and then screams as they fly away.

Flash forward to 2035 or as the movie stated, NOW.  Hee.  These army men are doing something in the city and find this room full of pulsating, virus ridden bodies and they realize that they have a problem.  The Reaper virus has infiltrated the wall!  They must find a cure!  Some man named Kane had been working on a cure and then disappeared before they closed the wall.  So, the army and some government higher ups get this woman to help them out.  She has this robotic eye that she can throw ahead of her to see what's going on around corners and stuff.  Then she can put the eye back in her head when she's done using it.  Guess who she is!   The woman, Sinclair, meets with her team and they all get in these supposedly indestructible tank-like vehicles.  The wall is opened up and they leave the safety of the city for the first time in like 20 something years.  As soon as they get out of the walls, one of the tanks hits something.  They shoot up a flare and realize they are in the middle of a giant field of cows and the tank had completely smushed a cow.  

They ride on into the city and it's all overgrown and they make it to the hospital where Kane was supposedly seen last.  They all get out with their guns and lasers and flashlights and start poking around.  They enter the virus ward and there are all these bodies and bloody sheets of plastic all over the place.   Suddenly, all of these punk rockers come busting into the hospital, screaming and flashing axes and bows and arrows all over the place.  The army people start blowing them away with their machine guns and yelling and it was rather difficult to figure out what was going on.  Oh wait, two of the team members stayed in the tanks while the rest of them went into the hospital and one of the men sees a woman on his video feed in the tank.  He goes outside even though the team repeatedly screams at him NOT to leave the tank and gets the woman.  He puts her inside an isolation chamber inside the tank and then the two tank drivers start heading around the hospital to meet the team at the loading dock.  There is a lot more screaming and blood spraying and machine guns shooting and the team gets in the elevator, even though there is no power.  They cut the elevator cable and throw this grenade that explodes into foam which cushions their fall to the bottom of the elevator shaft. Meanwhile, the woman in the isolation chamber escapes and cuts the tank driver's throat.  He crashes into a building and the indestructible tank blows up.  The rest of the team crams into the other tank and that driver gets shot through the windshield with an arrow, so that tank crashes too.  Sinclair gets captured by the punk rockers and the other 2 guys run into the alley to hide.

When Sinclair wakes up, she is hanging from the ceiling by chains and this stupid looking guy with a blond mohawk and a giant biohazard symbol tattooed on his back is screaming in her face.  He punches her a few times and wants to know why she's there and he also drops the f-bomb, oh, about a MILLION times.  Then he tells the guards to keep her alive and goes out to this stage with a big skull painted behind it.  "Good Thing" by the Fine Young Cannibals is playing and all the other punks are screaming and cheering.  Then they roll this dude out, who was a partner of Sinclair's.  The blond mohawk dude, Sol, and his girlfriend set the guy on fire and then the punk rockers all start EATING HIM.  We fast forwarded through that part because it was way nasty.  In the meantime, Sinclair manages to escape from her cell and she also picks up this woman on the way, who tells her that she can get her to Kane.  Sinclair beheads Sol's girlfriend as well.  Then Sinclair hooks back up with the rest of her team and they start running from the punk rockers.  They get to a train station and get on board a steam engine and escape!

Then Cally, the woman who Sinclair rescued and her boyfriend Joshua, are going to take the team to a safe place in the woods.  They ride on the train for a long time and then when they get out, they go through a secret passage in a mountain.  Inside the secret passage was a giant room with all kinds of crates and boxes.  When they get out to the other side of the mountain, Cally gets scared because she hears Kane's executioner coming.  A man in a suit of armor rides up on a horse.  I bet you weren't expecting that!  We weren't either.

They go to this castle and Kane yells at them and is totally unhelpful.  He tells them that the people in the woods are immune to the virus and he doesn't have a cure.  It was natural selection.  Then Sinclair is put in this arena and she has to fight this giant guy wearing a black suit of armor and carrying a spear.  Sinclair doesn't get any weapons, which is totally unfair.  They beat each other around and somehow Sinclair gets a knife or something and stabs the guy in the head.  He dies.  Then they all escape on horseback and Kane yells after them.  They go back to the secret passage in the mountain and Sinclair opens one of the crates.  Guess what was in it!  A Bentley!  They find a drum of gasoline and fill it up.  Sinclair also opens another crate so she can get a phone.  One of the other team members manages to get the auxiliary power on so they can escape out this giant door.  As Sinclair waits for that team member, he gets shot in the back by a bunch of arrows so she has to leave him and scratches the Bentley all up as she just barely gets through the doors.

Sinclair, Cally and a doctor are flying down the highway in the Bentley when guess who they see on the horizon?  Yep, the punk rockers.  They're all riding these motorcycles with skeletons on the front or driving these beat up cars that probably had names like "Widowmaker."  Somehow those vehicles are able to catch up to and outrun a Bentley.  Right.  Sol is driving a car with his girlfriend in the front seat.  But I thought Sinclair beheaded her?  Then her head falls off so yes, that is what happened.  There is a lot more screaming and gun shooting and people jumping from car to car.  Sinclair plays chicken with the punk rockers and some of them drive off of a cliff.  Sol jumps on top of the Bentley and keeps trying to crawl inside the car.  More punk rockers drive up in a city bus and park it across the road.  Sinclair drives through it in the Bentley.  Sol dies.

Then an army helicopter lands in the road in front of them and it turns out that they can make a vaccine from Cally's blood since she is immune to the virus.  Sinclair records the prime minister or somebody plotting the downfall of the entire human race on her robot eyeball and they all fly away, except Sinclair stays back with the Bentley.  A bunch of boring stuff happens and Sinclair gives the recording of the prime minister to a police officer.  She drives back to the punk rockers and throws Sol's head at them and tells them that if they want to eat somebody to have a piece of their friend.  They all cheer.  The end.

Now, you want to go rent "Doomsday," right?

Oh, and the Complaint Department has noted that I have written 3 posts with no pictures of Maggie, so here you go!