The Best Laid Plans

In light of Meredith's referral, I thought I would give some insight into the reality of having a kid in your house. Because I certainly know what I planned for and the truth is, they didn't really match up. So without further delay...

You can have the beautiful monogrammed blanket from Pottery Barn Kids

but all she will sleep with is the blanket from Walmart.

You can have the sterling silver baby spoon and fork that matches your silver pattern

but all she will eat with is the plastic spoon from IKEA. Or her fingers.

You can have a bag full of shoes for her to wear

but all she will wear are the black "patent leather" shoes from Walmart. With EVERYTHING!

You can have a bookcase full of books for her to read

(and I know it looks really empty right now but we are doing the toys on rotation thing around here 

so 2/3 of them are packed up for the time being)

but all she will want to look at is your Weight Watchers points book.

You can have a ton of cute hairbows to put in her hair

but her hair will mostly look like this.

You can have a closetful of clothes for her to wear

but her favorite article of clothing will be too small, high water yoga pants.

You can have lots of cool toys designed to stimulate the imaginative and foster creative play

but her favorite toy will be the dustpan and broom you bought for you.

You can plan to have family dinners with interesting conversation

but you will end up sitting in the den and watching "Star Wars" instead.

But also, you will plan to love this little girl and take care of her and play with her and the reality of it is, you will. But you cannot plan how much you will love her and how you will do anything to make her happy and laugh. And you will sing "Itsy Bitsy Spider" with hand motions out in public and you will laugh when she tells you she has a wedgie but she pulled it out. And you will have countless pictures taken of you in your pajamas while your daughter looks like a fashion plate but you will come to realize and take comfort in the fact that when you're out, no one is looking at you anymore. And your life will never, ever be the same but it will be so wonderful and messy and fun that you can't quite remember life without her.